You don't have to say the words you think I want to hear anymore.
Just a few more true words out of you would be enough.
Stop ignoring me, yeah?

ready.set.go.

Idontcare.
I am going to just forget about it.
And be happy.

No more confusion.
Just truth.

and the funny thing is

i still check it,

just incase.

fading fast.

three hundred people are reading a story i don't know the ending too.

i don't even know if i understand who i'm writing about.

maybe, just maybe, i imagine the weirdest things,

just to make myself believe that everything is great.

or maybe, i don't imagine anything at all,

and everything really is great.

but i know that isn't true,

because i know some truths about this story,

and at this point,

the ending doesn't look to be too happy.

i can't be held up to expectations i'm not aware of,

in the same way i can't hold anyone up to expectations they are not aware of.

i can't decide what they can't decide,

nor can anyone else decide what i cannot.

is anything certain in my thoughts?

completely certain -

without a hint of doubt.

well, one thing i know of,

but it could be fading fast.

things seem to be doing that a lot lately.

fading fast,

as time slows.

funny.

NoLongerJustWords.

Would it be worth it,

Just to be with someone

That understands your worth?

Oh, and,

Not everything I say is about you.

Don't assume things?

Thanks .

oh, shut up.

Nothing is going to happen.

You live freaking six hours away.

Leave me alone.

Please.

Slkasjdfl;kjsad.

hjukl.

.

I'm tired of you're crappy attitude towards everything.

I'm trying to be happy, but you're really just making me angry.

I understand that you're going through a lot. Don't blame me for things I'm not doing.

.

I can't decide what you can't decide.

But I guess you can't decide what I can't decide either.

.

SummerCircuit.

We overthink and overanalyze
When the answer's right in front of our eyes
We won't change over night
Let's not forget who we are
And let's promise with our pinkies crossed
These things take some time

Hm.

today was good.

i am happy.

undecided.2.

I can't decide if I hate how you've been able to figure out exactly what I mean by the way I say things, or if I like it.

You're the first that's done it.

It makes me feel vulnerable.

Need.Convince.Disappear.

Maybe I wouldn't want to disappear at all, maybe, just maybe, I convince myself into believing that it's needed. I don't think it's needed at all.

adlkj

I would like to disappear.

For a long time.

brian.andreas.

"I have too much to lose, she said, if I cross that line. Like what? I said. She could not think of anything that day so she said she'd get back to me. Since then I've been thinking what I would lose if I cross my line & I haven't come up with anything either. There's always another line somewhere."

"I was waiting for the longest time, she said. I thought you forgot. It is hard to forget, I said, when there is such an empty space when you are gone."

"Torn between wanting to stay & wanting to go & worried it will be the wrong decision either way."

"Leaning out as far as she can, hoping she'll fall soon, so she can stop worrying about whether it will happen or not. "

,

what is that supposed to mean?

Don't Listen To A Word You've Heard.

"Close your eyes, try to seek a vision you can listen to. A vision of collisions of what you know is true. You can do what you pursue if you only try to open your eyes and listen to the visions with collisions risen from what you've listened to. Listen to, no, don't listen to a word you've heard. Unless, unless the word that you've heard is a word you've said. Close your ears to words from out, unless the word came out of your head, or the word was built with your hands. Close your soul to the voice of man from a non-distant land. That man has a plan to put bullets through your stand. Do you understand this, or do you stand over this? Do you stand over me? You must not be listening, it's okay, I understand why."

Sorry if I weird you out.

I don't know what we are.

Last night made me realize just how selfish I am.

You.

Um.

Please don't make bad decisions.

Please don't hurt yourself.

Please don't do something stupid.

Please.

I'm afraid that I understand now.

I don't want to understand if understanding means what it means.

JustinNozuka.

Way above the clouds

And high above the stars

Through the unknown black holes

No one knows where we are.

Revised.

I am having some serious writing inspiration right now.

And for once, it's not about you - it's not about anyone.

I am happy. I am writing.

And I have no reason too.

I have no excessive thoughts to get off my chest.

I have no worries, no dreams.

Just happiness.

And it's funny how that's working out(:

Lomography.

So...I like it.

I guess I'll need about $350 now.

dreaming.

the silence isn't so deafening any more.

writeforme.

Two hundred fifteen.

Who knows, honestly?

Not me.

And The Truth Comes Out.

Admitting the words out loud was harder than I thought it would be. I never even admitted them to myself, in reality. The thought was there - the chance - but when it came down to it, the words came to my mind easily, though as I spoke them, they seemed to stick to my throat. I didn't want to admit the things I did. I don't want to admit defeat.

(170.)

On This Night.

on this night,

she sits alone.

on this night,

the stars and moon are full,

bright.

on this night,

the knotted and reaching tree

is still.

on this night,

all is right,

except -

on this night,

she is alone.

hah.

Tired of hearing the words you think I want to hear.

Just tell the truth and let what happens, happen.

..

and all I see is no more reasons to try.

undecided.

Let me riddle you a ditty, it's just an itty bitty, little thing on my mind.

About a boy and a girl, trying to take on the world one kiss at a time.

Now the funny thing about, ain't a story without it, but the story is mine.

And I wish you could say, that it ended just fine.

We all want to know - how it ends.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know?

Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.

Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

Inhale, breathe steady, exhale, like you're ready, if you're ready or not.

Just a boy and a girl trying to take on the world, and we want to get caught.

In the middle of a very happy ending, let's see what we've got, let's give it a shot.

Let's give it a shot.

We all want to know, how it ends.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know.

Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.

Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

We all have a story to tell.

Whether we whisper or yell.

We all have a story, of adolescence and all it's glory.

We all have a story to tell.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know.

Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.

Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

We all have a story to tell.

We all have a story to tell.

We all have a story to tell.

We all have a story to tell.

-happilyeverafter.weishe.

Thoughts Into An Excerpt.

"Eventually, the two sides have to connect. The puzzle always will fit together, no matter how hard, how different the two sides are. Eventually, they fit. And when they fit," He told me, "It'll be like an explosion."

I didn't answer, because I wasn't sure if I wanted to know more about this explosion, this puzzle.

He continued. "Whether you're by my side or not when the pieces collide, it'll be an explosion you'll see, you'll be effected."

How could one persons pieces effect someone not connected?

He read my thoughts, it seemed. "I'm part of your world, and you mine. We don't fade from that - we fade from memory, memory that some day, some way, will always come back."

"You're part of my world, not my entire world."

"So one part can't affect a whole? If that were true, the entire universe would be different."

I had no thoughts at this point.

Just wonder.

You want the sunrise to go back to bed.

I want to make you laugh.

Um.

I wish I had something to say to you.

I wish I could make everything better.

I wish it would all go away.

I wish a lot of things.

Sorry?.

:/

jsljasfkj.

Truth.

I want to close up and never tell anyone anything ever again.

All it leads to feeling left behind and confusion, it seems.

But doing that would mean giving up, admitting defeat, and that doesn't exactly seem right.

I would rather people not try to spare my feelings.

I would rather know what is going on.

I want to be one hundred percent happy.

For a long while.

No, not even a long while. Even just a day or two.

And sometimes, when Im with the right people,

And Im hearing what seems like the right words,

It all seems perfect.

But then I remember that nothing is perfect.

And those words were twisted maybe just a little too much in my mind.

And I'm just imagining things to be happy.

But maybe that's the part that isn't true?

How would I know.

I suppose I wouldn't.

"And I find that Im never alone, and I find that my heart is my home. And the music within makes me whole, a world that I built on my own. And the missing piece of me, I can find in the melody."

Oh, what if.

What if one day we just opened our eyes only to find out everything was a tightly woven dream?

Or even that we were pawns in a game?

What if there is another world out there, maybe finding more reason to live better, maybe in total war?

What if there are many other worlds out there, and one day, the worlds would all collide?

What if?

everything is happening at once.

then nothing happens at all.

um.?

well.

I don't know what's happening.

So.

Someonelikeyou - sorry.

Strong enough? Wrong enough? Made my way? Chosen to stay? Become like someone else? Be like you? Stay with you? Held in my arms? -Would you be strong enough?-

You're asking all the wrong questions way too late for an answer. And if you really want to sound "sweet" don't use lyrics from a song next time.

121.

Not you,

(Unless it needs to be, I guess?)

But mostly, not you.

This awkward ignore-don't ignore period is not much fun.

Either you do, or you don't.

But don't act like it's one when it's not.

Honestly.

.

I have an incurable disease.

This disease doesn't have me.

96now?

I don't know what I'm searching for anymore.

I miss you.

hah.

eh//

Don't hide behind the pages

I'm trying to memorize,

Don't hide the broken pieces

I need to see.

I know that I've let you down;

But whatever it takes.

Story.

The count is up to seventy-three now. That's seventy-three more people then I thought would see.

Can't help but wonder if one of them might be the one person it's about.

2 Corinthians 12:7-10

⁷To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. ⁸Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. ⁹But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. ¹⁰That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Some days you wake up feeling great.

Full of possibility, freedom and love.

But you haven't had one of those days in a while.

Maybe ever.

explain.

umM.

Falling up. Wish it was possible. Follow me. Stay with me.

Isounddumb.

Idontknow.

Time.

I wish I would've met you a few months earlier. Then maybe, just maybe. you could've talked me out of the worst mistake I've made, while all my other friends pushed me towards it. Funny how time works against you sometimes.

Time.

Does time ever slow? Or speed up?

Would we notice if it did - forgetting all the science that would prove it to be doing one or the other.

Would anyone notice - without science - that the day is ten minutes longer, or shorter?

Would anyone care?

What would it mean?

technicolorphase.

And if you cut me,

I suppose I would bleed

The colors of the evening stars.

You can go anywhere you wish.

Cause Ill be there wherever you are.

Done with being lost.

I want to figure myself out.

Silly dreams. Silly, silly dreams.

gone.

Um.

I wish I had something to say.

I wish I could be laying out in a field watching the stars.

So I could disappear for couple minutes, even seconds.

I want to disappear.

Imdone.

123?

takethis.

I can't see the stars tonight.

I want to see them.

mythoughts.

You'll never see the ending while you're young and still pretending.

found.

letitrain.

Oh, let the rain keep falling down

Cause it won't stop me

From getting where I'm bound

Maybe I'm crazy

Maybe it's too late

But I'm gonna make it

Don't care what the skies say

So oh, let it rain

Let it rain

I don't know where Im going with this.

- That's a lie, I do.

I just don't know if you'll be disappointed in what you see.

It's more simple then what I think you're expecting.

Imagine something great, but don't be let down if you find it.

live.truth.restart.

"A man should not be judged by his mistakes, but what he does after them."

yes.

Forty-three strangers are.

You've read half a page, whether you've realized it or not.

Your's.

Half a book written, half a page read.